Catching a pretty girl…

Some men know that the best way to catch the attention of a good looking woman is to “simply ignore the fact that she is present”.

Through my careful and meticulous observation (sarcasm!) I have come to the conclusion that pretty women seem to have some sort of “biological radar” for people, specially men, who do not acknowledge their presence or pay tribute to them as they walk by.  Some cunning men are aware of this phenomenon and tend to use it to their advantage.

- How, you ask?

Keep on reading, you’ll  figure it out soon enough.

Women are beautiful, mysterious and elusive creatures who are admired and desired by men.  Men would go to great lengths to capture the heart and mind of one of these beauties.   However, men do know that women are creatures who feed off their egos, while at the same time; they are jealous creatures who would compete and even fight for attention against each other.  Even amongst the closest of friends.

So what would be the logical way for a man to hook an elusive pretty woman?  Allow me to explain…

The scenario is usually the same…

It starts with a group of two or more women hanging out.  Now, within the group you will always see the same pattern… Good looking women usually hang out together, but there is always one that stands out from the rest, and one that is usually considered, in men terms, the uglier one, either by face or body.  The “uglier one” is usually there for ego support to the better looking ones.

-  Why do I say this?

Well, consider the following:

When there are two women, one good looking and the other one just OK, or not very attractive at all, who gets the most of the attention from men? Right, the better looking one!  And whose ego gets fed?… You got it!

The Man’s Math:

Problem…
There are two women, one pretty, one not.  Man wants pretty woman.  Pretty woman don’t notice man.  If man say hello to pretty woman, pretty woman crushes man manhood.  What to do?

Equation:

Try [pickup “not-pretty” woman]+[ignore pretty woman]=[pretty woman notice man]+[pretty woman gets jealous]+[women fight each other to get man’s attention]+[pretty woman proves she can get man]=[man now have better chance of getting pretty woman]…

Solution: If [equation] is carefully executed = It works!

(Success is only considered after second or third date)

If you pay close attention, you will see it happen a lot in clubs, bars and other social places.

There is one pretty woman and one just “okay looking woman”.  Some men who know what they are doing would always approach the “okay looking woman” and ignore the pretty one.  Why?  Because the man knows that the better looking one is used to getting all the attention from men.  Most men usually ignores the “ok looking woman” and lay at the feet of the pretty one, feeding her ego.  Giving her the power and control to dismiss any man before he opens his mouth, because she knows that more will always come by.  She thinks “every man is the same”.

But… When the role is reversed, and the man approaches the “ok looking woman” and completely ignores the pretty one, something unusual happens…  The pretty one, begins to wonder “what the hell???”  What is wrong with this man that does not notice “me” here?  I am clearly better looking than my friend…

And so, the fight for attention begins…  Even though, she might not even be interested in the man; the simple fact that she is not getting the attention as it is usually the case, kills her. – and she would go to great lengths to win the attention of the man who seems to have only eyes for her friend (who is about to become a foe).

When women get on this mode, they go out of their way to prove that they can in fact win the man over, which will usually cause them to do things that they would not otherwise do.

What causes some women to flip so drastically? Could it be the challenge, or the need for attention?  I don’t really know, but I know it does happen quite often.

Next time you feel you need to compete for a man’s attention, take a step back and rethink “why you are doing what you are doing?”  Hopefully it will keep you from regretting your actions later on.

One advise…  Confidence and modesty in a good looking woman only adds to her beauty and makes her all the more desirable to men.

Enjoy life.

- G!

How come the phrase “I am married” does not seem to work with some guys?

If you’ve ever been hit-on by some guy trying to pick you up, but you don’t want to be bothered and you want to stop him cold.  So, you tell him that “you are married, engaged or otherwise taken”. Only, those  “key” words have no effect on him whatsoever.  Then, read on…

You’ve probably seen men who are down and discouraged by life; Basically dead, just going through life without aim?  That man has NO challenges in his life; therefore, his life is empty, meaningless, pointless and full of bitterness.  On the other hand, there are those who are nearly dying of heart attacks, because they are overwhelmed with too many challenges, but are much happier and fulfilled.  A man needs challenges to feel alive.

Evolution has brought men a long way from its primitive beginnings. Men were considered amongst the fiercest and most skilled predators in the land; relentless hunters that would stop at nothing until they got their prey. Some, became the meal for the prey, but that’s part of life.  Besides, you have to have some sort of bait to catch the prey, right?

The hunters would bring their catch back to the village.  The most cunning and skilled hunter would always take the biggest and choicest piece of meat, while all the others would try to figure out how to take it from him, just because it was a daring challenge.  It might have meant death or severe injury, but it was a challenge nonetheless.

As ages have passed, men have become more refined than ever before. Well, some more than others.  Yet, in spite of our evolution and refinement, some genetically embedded traits have not, and will not ever change… “Men are driven by challenges”.

As simple as that.  Men love a good challenge.

OK, so what does primitive hunting and challenges have to do with “married or otherwise taken women?  Simple… “It’s a challenge”.

You have probably noticed that when we are single and hoping to find a good relationship partner, not even the flies seem to come near us?  Why is that?  Well, because available is unappealing.  By nature we always want what we can’t or shouldn’t have.  Hence the saying “The grass is always greener right over the fence” (modified).

To illustrate:   A single, decent looking guy walking his dog might seem attractive to some women; but if that same guy is walking and holding hands with a good looking female, he now looks more appealing.  Why?  Because if she is in a relationship with him, there must be something good about him. However, if he has no one, the presumption is: something is wrong with him or he is not relationship material (a looser). – Who wants that?

Most men usually think the same way about single women. – Sorry, but it’s true.  That’s why you will always see men flocking to get with a girl right after the news of her break-up.  However, the ones that have been single and available become bitter when they that happening.

See, when a man sees a woman who might tickle his fancy, he knows that there is a good chance the woman has a significant other. Nevertheless, he will still make an attempt to get that woman to go out with him instead.  Why? It’s a challenge.

But what if she is single? Then we start wondering WHY?

The woman might say that she already has a man; but he already knew that before he approached her.  So, he says “But I don’t see a ring on that finger”. – Which means: So… You mean to tell me that you are committed to someone who doesn’t think YOU are good enough to commit to? (and the wheels start turning in her head).

The woman might say that she is engaged and show him the ring on her finger.  But he already saw the ring before he started talking to her.  So he says: Good for you.  Congratulations! – So when is the big day? (We know that if she has a solid date, things are really serious and it’s time to move on).  If she says “we don’t really have a date picked out yet”. He knows that she is just in “lay away”, he might say something like: “Oh, I am sorry for you… so he just took you off the market, but you don’t have a real day, huh? (and walk away).  This will leave the woman feeling insecure about herself, her fiancé, and even the ring that she is wearing.

The woman might say that she is married; but he probably thought of that possibility as well.  So, he might try to appeal to the known fact that a large percentage of married women suffer from the syndrome called “unfulfilled marital relations”.  He knows that between one and two years of marriage, the woman is still on a high from “the new begins of her wonderful married life”. Although, some might still be fearful of the “lifetime” commitment and haven’t sowed their royal oats.

However, statistics say that divorce rates are high between three and seven years.  During this period married couples get to know one another for who they “really” are, and the “lifetime-marriage thing” sets in quite heavily.  Monotony and the daily grind of life might be the normal routine, making them more prone to fall for someone willing to pay them some attention or compliments they no longer hear at home.

Yes, its sick and it’s sad.  But some men prey on women who have “I-am-married-and-bored-to-tears” written all over their foreheads.  Women who are on this stage of marriage are vulnerable and in need of attention.  So he knows that a little bit of attention is magnified many times over, especially from someone new.

If she has kids, some men try to use her kids to appeal to her affection by pretending they like the kid and he is not interested on anything other than the youngster(s).  What does an unsuspecting mother sees?  A kid loving guy who seems to be NOTHING like her husband who does not spend time with her or the kids.  What is the result?  Now, the guy (predator) is on her head.

Some men also pretend to be the friend and confidant who is willing to listen to your ranting about boyfriend, fiancé or husband, just to get closer to you.  Because he knows that there will come a time when you will be vulnerable and dependent on the crying shoulder and listener friend he has been pretending to be, and… KA-POW!!!  You won’t see it coming… but you are now falling for him, thinking he is the most wonderful and understanding man you’ll ever meet. You’ve been played!

Some men see all these sick games as “challenges”.  The challenge is to take something, or someone away from somebody else.  Once they achieve their goal they move on to the next challenge.

I wish I had answers as to how to counter the tactical games of some men who prey on vulnerable women.  But I don’t.  The only thing I can suggest is to make wise decisions and question the motives of the guys who approach you.  Take this topic (reading) into consideration, however farfetched it may sound, and learn how to see through the games SOME men play.

Men WILL play you if you let them.  It’s just a hunting game.  It’s just a challenge.

- G!

Women Categorized?

A CRUDE BUT REAL PERSPECTIVE FROM MEN POINT OF VIEW.

Can women be categorized?
This section is going to be shocking to most women because of the nature of the topic and the sensitivity that goes with the issue.

Be forewarned, this is one of those things women are NOT supposed to know.

Now, I won’t claim to know jack about women.  In fact, women are and will forever be a beautiful and mysterious being to me. I don’t even know if there is such thing as categorization of the male spectrum within the obscure culture of women, which remains hidden from men.  However, when it comes to men, we do have an unwritten and unspoken categorization about women that is genealogically embedded.

About 97% of the men I have touched this topic with admitted that we as men instinctively put women (non-relatives) into one of four basic categories.

The categories are:

• Friend
• Lover
• Lifetime Companion
• and those we wouldn’t mess with

Each woman, without exception or discrimination to race, religion, social status, or the likes… automatically falls into one or more of these classifications with every man.  The good thing is that every man is different, therefore has a different taste than the guy next to him.

Within the first couple of seconds we glance at a woman we automatically classify her and she is shoved into one of those categories I mentioned.  As I said, I don’t know if it works out the same way with women, but it does work out for men.

For example: Just because Tom might classify you as a friend and nothing else, does not mean that Rick (Tom’s Friend) classifies you as friend too. You just might be seen as a lover/lifetime companion.  Its different with every man. Thank God for that. Otherwise, the friends would be destined for a life of singlehood and unfulfillment.

At first glance we can tell whom we may want to mate with, those we would just like to mess around with and whom we would do as last resort and if we were drunk.

It has nothing to do with chemistry, because chemistry takes the interaction of the two to develop the so called chemistry.  Interaction is really not required for a man to know that there is a potential mate, a friend or just someone to mess around with.

To illustrate, in a crude but realistic way (without offending the female gender) it’s like window-shopping:  “I want that one, that one, and… No, not that one. The next one over”…

So what are the characteristics of each type (Friend, lover, etc…)?  Let me try to break it down.

Category 1: The Friend
The friend is the one that a man sees as either a little sister or an equal buddy with whom he feels comfortable and there is no sexual tension among them.  He generally feels at ease and does not feel like he has to pretend to be something he is not, nor make attempts to impress her. She is just cool to have around and hang out with.  No attraction whatsoever.

Category 2: The Lover
The lover is the type of women that makes a man’s flip-flops curl in more ways than one.  The attraction is intense, raw and animal-like.  There is an unspoken “I-just-want-to-jump-you…aaarrrrg!” sort-of-thing going on inside the man’s head, which cannot be dismissed or put aside.  The air between them feels as if it is charged with electricity.  Every time they are together, whatever the circumstances might be, all the man wants to do is to be all over her.  Usually, no real friendship can be developed with women in this category because the man is not really interested in getting to know her, except intimately.

Note that intimacy for most men does not have the same effect as it does for most women.  There is a level of emotional detachment, from the man’s side, that’s usually synonymous with women in this category.

Category 3: The Lifetime Companion
The lifetime companion is the real deal.  This is the type of woman that a man just want to be around.  You know how you women always ask us to cuddle?  Well, this would be sort of the equivalent of men asking women to cuddle.  This type of woman is generally classifies as the lifetime companion.  All the man wants to do is hold her in his arms and not let go.  Kissing and making love is not that important and comes as an added bonus, because the man just don’t want to rush things and screw everything up.  When a woman is classified in this category, the man goes into high gear trying to clean up his act to hopefully, and I mean “hopefully” be a potential suitor for the woman.  A man can picture him and her way into the future, and hopes she would also look to a future together as he does.

Many times women mess up and leave thinking that the man does not want her, because he is not making a move to get her in bed; not realizing that she might have been the special one that he did not wanted to rush things with.

Category 4: The Ones we wouldn’t mess with
Well, quite simply put… “HELL NO!”

So there you have it!  The best way I can explain the categorization in which you have been a part of.  Perhaps we all (men and women) have such categorizations for the opposite sex.  But men just didn’t know it.

Here is a bit of advice for the ladies out there…
Next time you have someone who seems to cherish you and is not making a “dunking” move on you… Perhaps, he might think of you more than what you think of yourself. – Maybe you just hit the jack-pot and just don’t know it yet.

Be the friend, be the lover if that’s what you’re into, but be aware that we as men will always categorize you. – If you are not happy with the category you’re currently in, then… Find your happy place!

- Giovanni!

PS: Please feel free to leave a comment.
For the fellow men, if you read this post and you feel it is off base, feel free to leave your remarks (without the profanity). Thank you.